Cravings

cravings

We all have cravings, right? If nothing else, we, as women, may have gone through a pregnancy that may have driven cravings such as pickles and ice cream or other strange combinations of food. Addicts crave their addictions: alcohol, nicotine, narcotic drugs, chocolate.

I crave time alone. Maybe the non-stop time I spent working outside the home, always at someone else’s beck and call, from age 18 to 55 has driven this craving. Maybe it’s because I married and had children too young. I simply have never been able to get enough time alone. I’d like to pick up a novel and read it from start to finish in one sitting. I’d like to sit in a hot, bubbly tub of water until I’m actually ready to get out. I’d like to clean the house and have it stay exactly as I left it for an entire day or even, imagine it, for a whole week. I’d like to pick up a crochet needle and create something warm and cuddly without stopping until I’m done. I’d like to work project after project without interruption until I’m ready to stop. I’d like to snuggle in bed for an entire day, dozing in and out, without interruption. I’d like to listen to Adele’s latest album from start to finish in one sitting. I’d like to take a road trip and stop anywhere that strikes my fancy along the way. What bliss is this!?

The fact that I like to spend time alone does not mean that I don’t also enjoy spending time with others. It simply means I need a good balance of time spent alone vs. that spent with others, even my husband, in order to be a well-balanced person. If I don’t get enough of one or the other, I’m just not hitting on all cylinders, so to speak.

Since my retirement, I’m constantly asked if I’m not lonely. I guess what ‘lonely’ means is that I’m bored and wishing someone else was around since I’m no longer working at a ‘job’ every day. I can’t remember the last time I was lonely. It’s just a matter of choosing what I’ll be doing next. And I cannot wait to do that!

Am I alone in this? Do you get lonely easily? What are your cravings?

 

Horoscopes?

horoscope

While I don’t usually put much faith in daily horoscopes, I happened across mine on my Yahoo! home page recently:

“You are your own greatest distraction now, yet you might choose to keep your thoughts quiet. Your newly formed ideas aren’t anyone else’s business so there is no need to share them with others. Even if you don’t reveal the nature of your inner world today, give yourself permission to explore it on your own. Muster up the courage to go wherever your imagination takes you, for there are surprises in the darkness that can lead you back into the light.”

This sounds a lot like me, and as is often the case when I do read the Horoscopes, I can relate. I tend to keep my thoughts and ideas to myself so much that I forget my husband doesn’t know what I’ve been working up in my head. When the topic comes up between us, I’m sometimes caught by surprise and frustrated that he has no idea what I’ve been thinking.

Over the course of my life, I’ve heard warnings against paying any attention at all to Astronomy and Horoscopes and anything related because of an evil Pagan connection. Other folks go to the other extreme and live their lives only by what the ‘stars’ tell them.

What do you think about horoscopes? Are they essentially messages from God through the reading of the biblical heavens? Are they messages from the Universe? Are they messages from Satan? Are they ‘fun’ or are they ‘hurtful’ in some way?

 

Just Enough

liberation

I’m fascinated by the ladies that carry ‘the kitchen sink’ in their handbags. What is the real reason behind their perceived need to have all of these things with them at all times? Is it an insecurity of some kind? Is it a fear of heading outside the home? A fear that something horrible will happen and they will be left without any small possession remaining, so they need to take their dearest possessions with them on every excursion? If the wind blows, is it a disaster if we don’t have a brush and hairspray to immediately put it back into perfect position? If it rains, is it a disaster if we can’t immediately re-apply a layer of make-up?

Along the same lines, why do so many people need so much space in their homes? Why so many things hidden away in all of those walk-in closets? Why do we have this unstoppable need to feel like we’re prepared for any situation with all of these ‘things’? The excess of the 1980’s and 1990’s seems to have infiltrated all things – why do we need so much and so big?

Undoubtedly, I have been there. I lived through my 20’s and 30’s on the fast track working for all of these things and I ended up with a house jam-packed with stuff that I treasured above all else. My handbag was as heavy as anyone’s. I would never ever have allowed myself to be seen without eyeshadow, earrings, and hairspray strong enough to hold through the worst possible windstorm. But. Why?

These days, I simply cannot relate. I live as close to the earth as I possibly can. If I need to run somewhere, I pick up my driver’s license and debit card and out the door I go. No disaster has ever occurred as a result of my daring behavior. I sold my house and pretty close to everything in it and am living in a very downsized world. My stress level is non-existent. I fully believe that if something happens that causes me to need something, I have the resources to go out and get it. I do not need to store seven versions of it in my house so that I have it before I ever need it. I do not need to have a house big enough to hold all 21 relatives for the one time a year they come to visit — there are many options out there for acquiring gathering places at any range of expense, from free to luxury.

I do understand some women have issues like needing to carry medications or related items with them, and diaper bags are also exceptions, some folks need larger homes than others, and they definitely get a pass from these comments. But my hope for all women is that they will one day have the opportunity to feel the liberation of heading out of the house with only a hairbrush run through the hair and a driver’s license and debit card in the pocket. I double dog dare you!

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